The joke thread

[Grecian O'Grecian]

Yep, mine was better.

 

[graiser]

'A dozy Excretian bought his wife a Jaguar for Christmas, he hid it in the garage, when she opened the door it bit her head clean off', dozy beggar !

 

[contrabombarde]

A fairy granted me one wish last night.... I asked if I could live forever..."Sorry I can't grant that sort of wish" she said. "O.K then I want to die when Plymouth argyle get back in the championship league again" I said."You crafty bugger " she said.

 

[graiser]

An Excretian bey went to the docs.

"What can I do for you bey" said the doc

"I've got an hereditary problem" said the Excretian, "it's diahorreah"

"Well that's not hereditary" said the doc

"Well it's in my Jeans"

 

[tigertony]

My friend took his Missus to the Docs as she was unwell. Doc took a look and said ''Its either aids or alzeihmers'' Mate said ''WTF how am I going to find out?'' Doc rubbed his chin and looked pensive then said ''I know - take her in town and give her the bus fare home. If she gets home don't sleep with her''

 

[les.gtfc]

My Champion racing snail hasn't been winning many races recently so I decided to take off his shell to help with his weight and aerodynamics.

Unfortunately it doesn't seem to have worked. If anything it's just made him more sluggish.

 

[tagz]

Clinton Morrison went on a large shooting spree in Exeter... No-one was hit.

 

[Grecian O'Grecian]

No-one was hit.

If only a certain Argyle player was so lucky.

 

[tigertony]

Plymouth Argyle - goodnight!

 

[Silver fox]

Plymouth Argyle - goodnight!

At least your honest tiger respect.