todays joke

[glos_grecian]

What do Plymouth Argyle and a c0cktail stick have in common?


Both have 2 points.

Two weeks ago I posted this.

 

[Grecian_In_Exile]

Two weeks ago I posted this.

with any luck you can post it again in another 2 weeks <snigger>

 

[absentfriends]

Caster Semenya's mum is very upset that poor Caster has been forced to take a gender test. She said: "This is a real kick in the b0ll0cks for my daughter!"

The IOC have today announced that the South African 800m star has today failed a urine test. She couldn`t get her d1ck in the jar

 

[Tinballs]

Michael Jackson was so dissapointed when Steven Gately came to heaven. He thought they said someone from the BOYS HOME was coming !

 

[ECFC Nursey!]

A nurse on a ward takes a phonecall
'good morning i wonder if you can help me - Mrs Smith was admitted last night and I wonder if you could tell me how she is?'
'certainly' the nurse said ' do you know what ward she is in?'

'she is in ward 2b room p'

'hold on please caller I will find out for you'

After consulting the notes the nurse comes back and says
'she has had some test today, her temperature is down and pending her blood teats tomorrow and an assessment about her home circumstances she should be able to go home tomorrow'

caller says 'thank you very much'.

Nurse says ' thats not a problem, can I ask if you are a relative or friend of Mrs Smith'

Caller says ' neither its mrs smith from ward 2b room p, but this is the only way I can find out what the bloody hell is going on with me'

Made me chuckle that one

 

[iscalad]

Neil Warnock, Arsene Wenger, Alex Ferguson and Rafa Benitez are in a pub. Warnock gets up get's a round in, Wenger get's up and get's the next round in, then Ferguson and then Benitez. Neil Warnock then goes to bar, buys himself a pint and sits back down, Wenger, Ferguson and Benitez ask "what's going on?" To which War...nock replies....."This is the fifth round lads and your not f*ckin in it"