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May morning, hanging round a trapdoor
Saw a girl like I’ve never seen before
I wanna make her mathematically safe
Wanna keep her mathematically safe
Take her up where we’re mathematically safe
Gonna wake up mathematically safe
Mid table there’s nothing much on my fork
It’s alright though ‘cos I can go for my walk
Around Cartmel, mathematically safe
With no alarm bell, we’re mathematically safe
On a lilo, in a sea of alright
I’m a mongrel and I just won a dog fight
Got tickets to see these in January bought for my birthday by the lady. Well chuffed.
I picked up all the elastic bands dropped by the postman on my driveway
And took them up to the pub on a Thursday evening
As that’s where he likes to go for the quiz.
He believes he is needed for the music round,
His friends obviously humour him.
Anyway, I place myself at a nearby table
And whenever he tries to light up a cigarette
I fire it out of his mouth with one of the elastic bands
Which he finds most annoying.
Most annoying.
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