Little things that annoy you

LOG

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My only joy is a cuddly toy.
Now, i'm usually a fairly tolerant person, but it's the little things that annoy me. Here are some to start you off and the only requirement is that you justify yours, no matter how petty or misguided.

  • Cous cous – try sawdust as a cheap and tastier alternative.
  • Betterware catalogue people – if you put junk mail through my letterbox then disturb me a week later asking for it back, don’t expect anything other than a frosty reception.
  • The Big Issue – homeless person, I applaud you for getting off your backside and trying to get a few quid together, but I won’t be buying your magazine today. It’s not because I don’t think you’re deserving, it’s because it’s a crap magazine so don’t make me feel guilty.
  • People who do imaginary golf swings – stop acting like a ponce.
  • Stephen Hawking – I’m still not convinced that he’s the brains of the operation and it’s not the computer doing all the work.
  • Cucumber – over 90% water and it still tastes like that?
  • People who work in Vision Express – what’s with the attitude?
 
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Alistair20000

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Looking for Guy Fawkes to finish the job
Now, i'm usually a fairly tolerant person, but it's the little things that annoy me. Here are some to start you off and the only requirement is that you justify yours, no matter how petty or misguided.

  • Cous cous – try sawdust as a cheap and tastier alternative.
  • Betterware catalogue people – if you put junk mail through my letterbox then disturb me a week later asking for it back, don’t expect anything other than a frosty reception.
  • The Big Issue – homeless person, I applaud you for getting off your backside and trying to get a few quid together, but I won’t be buying your magazine today. It’s not because I don’t think you’re deserving, it’s because it’s a crap magazine so don’t make me feel guilty.
  • People who do imaginary golf swings – stop acting like a ponce.
  • Stephen Hawking – I’m still not convinced that he’s the brains of the operation and it’s not the computer doing all the work.
  • Cucumber – over 90% water and it still tastes like that?
  • People who work in Vision Express – what’s with the attitude?
Perhaps you do not buy the right cous cous or fail to serve it with the appropriate Moroccan fare and bottle of rough Algerian wine. A traditional cous cous dish should contain seven different vegetables.

Here to help.
 
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Flying like a pig in the sky
Ants - Always in my f*cking jam
Fish - They're just boring
Snails - See above
Slightly gone off milk - It's just irritating when the milk almost smells and tastes right but you know that something's a bit wrong
Stamps - The ones with the new oval shaped things that are supposed to stop you using them again, but always come off before you can use them once.
Safety pins - Not so f*cking safe when one jabs it's way into your arse cheek.
 

LOG

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My only joy is a cuddly toy.
Perhaps you do not buy the right cous cous or fail to serve it with the appropriate Moroccan fare and bottle of rough Algerian wine. A traditional cous cous dish should contain seven different vegetables.
That, dear boy, is exactly my point. If you have to add in several other ingredients to make it edible, then you shouldn't be eating it in the first place.
 
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Flying like a pig in the sky
That, dear boy, is exactly my point. If you have to add in several other ingredients to make it edible, then you shouldn't be eating it in the first place.
Hmmm. I think that more people should live by this philosophy. Although there may be a few problems. For example, flour isn't very nice on it's own but if you add a bunch of other stuff then you get biscuits, which are nice.....except Rich Tea, they're sh*t.
 

InTheBigBank

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Really, really slow drivers when you're running late.

Abuse of the English language.

Traffic lights in places that they're not needed, for example; at the motorway services.

X Factor.

Chris Moyles.
 

LOG

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My only joy is a cuddly toy.
It's a muscle memory thing, gotta practice or they just forget.
That's what they'll have you believe. Show off knobbers, the lot of 'em.

I'll spare you the detail of how the situation arose, but i nearly dropped the TV remote down the toilet last night. It was a heart stopping moment.
 

Poultice

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Headaches, queues, wasps, spiders, punctures, 5p pieces, people that work in this country but can't speak English, HD & 3D tv, mobile phones, th'interweb, miniaturised thermo-nuclear devices, football pundits, economists, bankers, politicians, the French, kids, cold callers at the door or on the phone, text messages, cartoon dogs...............................................the list is endless.
 

Poultice

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I'll spare you the detail of how the situation arose,
Oh no, you can't do that.

I'm just about to spend the next two hours in purgatory, when I have finished punishing myself I expect the SP.
 
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