The Serious Torquay Thread

[geoffwp]

Are you the guy who used to be a Torquay supporter? You’re not the same bloke that used to abuse Martin Ling, then went and bought a Derby County season-ticket and flirted with York City for a bit and has now ended up supporting Exeter City? How long before you make it a Devon hatrick and start supporting to Plymouth?

You never know, you could become the first person to join the Devon Trio club but as a supporter rather than a player, when the time comes for you to jump ship and look for another club to “support”.

Interesting. You never did answer granville's question Lego.

 

[Billy The Fish]

I've read Lego's many posts on why he dumped Torquay and came to us in which he openly and honestly gives his reasons for doing so. He's a Grecian now, can't we leave it at that.

 

[elginCity]

Lego posts in real time on the matchday thread on occasion, while watching ifollow. Sort of thing only a fan would ever do !

 

[Legohead]

Interesting. You never did answer granville's question Lego.

Not that i need to furnish you with all the intricacies of my unconventional thought processes Geoff, but i will endeavour to add some context to the post.

Martin Ling was a manager who played a dour brand of football at Torquay and got the club into the play offs by basically winning 1-0 every week or drawing 0-0. His managerial style was so rigid and inflexible that he did get some criticism from many amongst the Gulls fanbase, some of which i can admit overstepped the mark.

As you know, i too have my own demons with mental health and when Martin Ling left the club suddenly, none of us knew why. It transpired that he too was really struggling with depression and mental health issues of his own. I remember reading about him basically having a meltdown and a panic attack in a motorway service station after a game which resonated with me because i've been there myself on many occasions.

The club then saw fit to sack him by text and offer him zero support which appalled me and actually was the catalyst for my alienation from the club. It got me thinking about how clubs treat people in general and i guess it became a bit of a obsession which is hard to ignore and still is. I wasn't proud or happy to be associated with the club anymore.

I wrote directly to Martin Ling to briefly share my struggle with mental health and to offer some words of comfort and support. In situations like this, people are more important than football. He subsequently got employed at Orient and did get help in the end and i am so happy that he did.

It was his bravery at coming out and admitting that he had struggles with mental health that inspired me to have the courage to be open about mine. Also, another ex Torquay player who i loved when he was at the club, Billy Kee, followed suit and came out with his own struggle with mental health.

The seeds of doubt had been sewn though, about the way TUFC ran things and how they treated people. Indeed, the treatment of Thea Bristow by some directors of the club was also appalling and furthered my alienation against the club.

For the benefit of the post from the Torquay fan, i followed the club all over the country through thick and thin well after Ling was replaced by the catastrophic appointments of both Alan Knill and then Chris Hargreaves. I was at the match away at Mansfield for the clubs last away game in the FL, already relegated so i will not ever accept any criticism of my support for that football club. I didn't just decide to pack it in and stop supporting them and decide it would be really great to follow another team. It manifested slowly over the course of a few seasons and was something that caused me a lot of distress and confusion.

Football was and is my life but so is doing the right thing and having standards of expectations about how certain things should be done, from a moral perspective. The suits that ran the football club on the back of the Bristow cash were frequently displaying callous, insular, selfish and quite frankly bizarre decision making.

Leroy Rosenior still holds the record for the shortest managerial reign in British football history. Go figure.

I perceived much of the fanbase as being apathetic and not standing up for what was not only a morally bankrupt old regime, but also a regime which still has an incumbent who actively refuses to engage with the TUST.

So, eventually i became alienated from not only the football club but also their fans and i was actually pretty angry for quite some time that effected me deeply on a psychological and personal level. The time had come to accept it and move on.

I met some great friends whilst supporting Torquay over the years, which was hard to do when you are trying to hide autism. To this day i have lost all contact with them and i acknowledge and accept that this loss had to be part of the severance of ties of the whole football club.

Having different neurology to most other people is often demoralizing because it always seems to be me who has to understand the views of others, yet my views always get misunderstood or misinterpreted and my intentions misjudged. As i've said before on this forum, there are some cracking blokes on here who do actually try to read between the lines of many of my posts rather than take them at face value such as Spoonz, Ali, Billy the Fish, Fred, DB9, Red Paul etc and this is fantastic for me as it makes me feel less stressed if i post something that i am aware could maybe is construed as persistently negative, repetitive or even perhaps odd or unkind. I know that some posters will have the intelligence and awareness to realize that often the content of the post comes from a place of frustration that cannot be expressed in any other way or a place of inflexible thinking. These thought processes do not define me as an individual, but they do define which football club i support.

I spent a couple of years deciding what i should do next. Should i pack in football altogether or try watching another team?

I do not have that same emotional attachment that most fans have to celebrating goals and having bad words said about their club therefore it is easier for me to not get carried away with the emotion of such things. I do however, have a stronger sense of duty rather than emotional attachment and thus my support of a football club is more about having a sense of duty more than any emotional attachment. If this makes sense?

I'm basically like a loyal, dutiful husband who is boring at sex. If the missus is happy then i'm happy but if the missus starts playing around or taking me for granted then i'm off. My decision making will be borne out of what holds the most importance to me, which in this case would be loyalty and treating someone with regard and equal respect. I will not make a decision based on emotional attachment, which is why it isn't really that difficult for me to start supporting another club with the same rigour as i did the previous.

I expect most other fans will not share this view and that's fine, because i understand they are emotionally attached to their clubs. However, loyalty is something we both share. As i've said with ECFC, so long as they continue to do right by me and treat fans with respect, consideration and engagement, then i couldn't care less if the club were in a sunday pub league. Clubs tend to dismiss or ignore this vital part of supporter relations and they can do this because by and large, most fans don't give a stuff. All they want to do is watch their team win. It is not important to them if the club interacts or not, ignores them or not. For me, it is imperative and forms the basis of my willingness to continue supporting a football club.

I spent a couple of seasons going to games of other clubs to see what it would be like, for various reasons. Either local clubs or clubs that i used to go to when i was a kid and lived nearby. One thing always kept raising its ugly head though and that was the relationship (or lack of) between the clubs and the fans. The lack of engagement and communication between both at all the clubs i went to was really poor and at some there were actively fans groups that wanted the owners out.

I did not want to jump from the frying pan into the fire and pledge my support to another team which is also run badly, because i knew i would end up having the same internal conflicts with myself and end up having to change again. The reality was however, as i saw it after doing much research - most clubs are actually run pretty badly and don't really give a toss about their supporters.

Which is where Exeter came in. I knew that if i was to continue to enjoy football once more then i needed to find a club with the same values as i had. From top to bottom. This obviously meant finding one that was supporter driven but also progressive off the field and that displayed endeavour, effort and a desire to interact and engage with fans and the local community.

Here i am. About 5 years in of supporting Exeter and i think the club and fans are amazing. I do feel like i am starting to fall into that trap of doubting the integrity of some people running ECFC, which i am really trying to stave off and treat as an unreasonable bias of thinking that i have rather that there is any grain of truth in it. I'm just tired of feeling the need to look to deeply into the machinations of a club and simply want to support the club, support the team, maybe make some new friends and continue to feel valued by the club and forget about club politics.

The impression i have got from the club during those 5 years and also the way they treat fans and are constantly engaging with them and helping out has been impressive and totally fits in with my values and my expectations of how a club should be run and i am happy that i can once again feel part of a team rather than an ostracized child, which is pretty much what Torquay and most other clubs think that their fanbase should be.

I'm pleased for Torquay, despite earlier bitter posts on this thread borne out of anger. That chapter of my life is done with and i have some amazing memories so i wish them no ill will and hopefully they can get promoted this season. They still have Osborne in the driving seat which is a concern but on the field, it has all gone to plan once they decided to actually employ a proper manager for once.

So Geoffrey. A bit more long winded than perhaps you'd like or were expecting but my loyalty to any club or any person is based on one simple premise. If they do right by me, then i will always do my best for them. I trust this now resolves your curiosity?

Oh and by the way. I could never, and would never support Plymouth under any circumstances.

 

[Legohead]

There are still some really hard working, passionate, dedicated people at TUFC trying their best to change the culture of the club and implement changes for the better for supporters but it is too late for me. I went down a rabbit hole so dark and deep that i didn't really have a hope of finding my way back out again.

My partner actually suggested Exeter to me as she studied at Bicton College in the late 90's and lived in Budleigh, although she is from Rotherham unfortunately. She would often go into Exeter with friends and has always called it her second home so i guess i can claim to have some connection now.

 

[jmgull]

Legohead - you just can't change to follow another local team & be taken seriously, not now.. not ever.

Being a fan doesn't work like that, you're a fraud.

You should choose another sport or follow the chiefs.

 

[onemansview]

Legohead - you just can't change to follow another local team & be taken seriously, not now.. not ever.

Being a fan doesn't work like that, you're a fraud.

You should choose another sport or follow the chiefs.

It's not the same for every one, sometimes you have to do what's in your heart. Works for me anyway!

 

[Grecian2K]

Well, I 4-1 welcome Leggsy to the fold.

After all, as the Bible (sort of) says: "I say to you, that likewise joy shall be in Devon over one Turkey that repents, more than over ninety and nine Grecians, who need no repentance." Luke 15:7.

 

[STURTZ]

Good win for Torquay at Chesterfield, blimey The National League goes on for a bit yet doesn't it?

 

[jmgull]

Good win for Torquay at Chesterfield, blimey The National League goes on for a bit yet doesn't it?

Didn't start till October.. but yes it's seemed a long gruelling season.
A bizarre season, will it/won't it finish, Dover just stopping playing.. & having their results expunged, no relegation meaning several clubs furloughing most of their squad & then being goal difference fodder over the last month or two.
Most teams look knackered with months of 3 games a week & injuries taking its toll.
I guess it also feels longer with live streaming having watched/suffered every game.

It's a very competitive top 9 or 10 though, with many good size league clubs throwing lots of money at it..
We had a huge lead pre Xmas but were reeled in when teams caught up with covid games & having a huge amount of injuries ourselves.
Despite having our front 3 & best defenders out for ages we've somehow put together a hell of a run..
It's still Sutton's to lose mind..